But, Sure, Let’s Examine How We Think They Would Have Thought About Today (Maybe They Can Tweet from the Grave)
A strange stench
encompasses the chamber
as the representatives
begin to arrive
Shocked faces abound
as they look to see
the founding fathers
seated in control
Dirt from the grave
graces their otherwise
distinguished appearance
All scramble to find seats
as Washington offers
the call to order
Elijah Cummings
stands and protests
this unconstitutional
seizure of power
Jefferson demands
a thorough beating
before the man
is returned to chains
“I beg your pardon,
but I am Speaker of the House,”
demands Nancy Pelosi
“A woman allowed
in Congress?!”
Franklin roars with laughter
“My dear, you cannot even vote.
Please sit back down”
“Will someone please
rise who actually
belongs here?”
an exasperated Madison
pleads
Dan Crenshaw slowly
gets to his feet
“Finally!” John Jay
exclaims. “Proceed”
“If I may,” Crenshaw continues,
“I’m a member of
the Republican party
from the state of Texas”
“The what party from where?”
chuckles Hamilton.
“This is ridiculous!
You are wasting
our time. Next!”
“You have no right
to take over these
proceedings,”
Sharice Davids insists
“Send that merciless
Indian savage
back to the reservation,”
comes a loud
holler from Jefferson
“Are we going
to discuss any issues
or are you just here
to try to remove
duly elected representatives?”
Ocasio-Cortez inquires
“Let her speak,”
Adams insists
“At this rate,
I’m going to die again
before this session ends”
“Can we talk about guns
that fire six hundred
rounds per minute,
corporate lobbyists that corrupt
this whole process,
or the 43 million
living in poverty
across our fifty states?”
“43 million?!” mumbles a
flabbergasted Franklin
“50 states?!” stammers
an incredulous Jefferson
“Muskets that do what?!”
shrieks Washington,
as his wig falls off
from the shock
Madison makes it to the door
before Hamilton, rushing behind him,
is heard to exclaim
“being dead wasn’t so bad”
Written July 4, 2019